Writing After Life Kicks You in the Teeth

I always thought that writer's block wasn't a real thing. That you could just sit down and start writing, and eventually you would figure out what should happen next. I wrote for over seven years and hadn't ever experienced a block that I couldn't work free of in an hour. Free writing, brain maps, and character interviews are all useful for that sort of thing. I've even written ridiculously impossible scenes before and then edited them into coherency.

Then my life blew up.

It's not that I didn't have time to write. Everyone has time to write, if they make it a priority. (Or so I've been told.) But my life was falling apart, and I felt like I couldn't talk to anybody about it for over a year. And the emotional stress, or depression, or whatever you want to call it (neither of those terms seem quite right) whatever it was, it sucked the creativity out of me. I can't really explain it any other way. I had no desire to be creative or think about stories or even read. Which is kind of a big deal, for me. I didn't read a single book for a year.

Like I said, it's not that I didn't have the time. It's not that I didn't have ideas or something to be working on. (I've been in the middle of Lost Princesses for an embarrassingly long time.) I just didn't. Or couldn't. I'm not sure which.

During that time, I moved twice and took care of my kids, took a few college classes, and prepared to build my life back from the ground up. And I'm still in the middle of that process. But recently, I had a story idea.

Not just any idea. The first idea I've had in a very, very long time. The first inkling that I would ever be able to write again. (The guilt of not finishing my other books had been the only motivation I'd had during that time, and it wasn't enough motivation, obviously.)

I wrote down my idea, sketching out a short story from beginning to end. And I've been kinda excited about it.

And then today, I had an idea on six other related short stories that could become something very cool. Something I've never seen before in fiction. And I got so excited about it that I felt an almost panicky feeling. The feeling that I needed to write. Now.

So I did. I wrote a thousand words today.

I'm not sure what will happen with my writing. I don't know when the next book will come out. But what I can tell you is that I am writing. And it feels awesome.

Things You Don't Know About Me (Unless I told you and forgot)

• You may know that my dad was in the military (Navy), so we moved around a lot. We lived in North Carolina, different parts of Florida and Virginia, Washington DC and Iceland. I learned a lot about the Icelandic culture during our stay there. (Yes, it's green, but only during part of the year. It snows a LOT and the grass is frequently soggy and brown.)
• I've eaten frog legs, squid, dolphin (one that had been caught in a tuna net), alligator, snail, fish sauce, water buffalo (yuk!), halo halo (an ice cream sundae with chick peas and weird purple ice cream, coconut, and other odds and ends) and something my husband showed me: an avocado filled with sweetened condensed milk. (Mmm!)

• One time I ate so many mangos, I almost developed an allergy to them. I was in the Philippines (where I ate the halo halo) where the mangos are INCREDIBLE. I ate a few every day until my lips started tingling. I decided to back off at that point. Still, even if I had become allergic, it would have been worth it. They were SO good!
• I've been to several foreign countries including Philippines, Mexico, Belize, Iceland, France, and England, but I've never been to the western United States.
• I'm the oldest of four girls. My dad is the oldest of 6 boys (plus one sister).
• My birthday is November 29th, the same as Louisa May Alcott, Madeleine L'Engle, and C.S. Lewis (unless someone lied to me)
• I married my husband here because we're Mormon (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). I'm always open to discussing my faith with others because it reminds me why I live this way. Besides, if  I have something that makes my life better, it shouldn't be a secret. It should be shared.

• I didn't always want to be a writer. It never really occurred to me. Growing up, I considered being "an artist" (when I was ages 5-7), a nurse, a lawyer, a psychologist, and a veterinarian, but I always knew I wanted to be a mom. The writing came later, and was inspired mostly by reading Harry Potter and some Gail Carson Levine in 2007.
• I don't want stardom. I like having readers that love my work. It's more important to me to keep those readers happy than it is to write the next best-seller. 
• I'm 6'1''. It wasn't easy growing up taller than all the boys, but I know that short people have their own problems. And at least I can reach the top shelf. :P
• One of my favorite things to cook is banana bread. Chocolate chips are a must.
• My big, scary German Shepherd is a softy. He was named after a character in a computer game.

Guybrush the German Shepherd

I have a sister who writes, though she hasn't published anything yet. She likes to use the pseudonym Emma Rosewood. I designed this book cover for her time travel romance. (I'll let you know when it comes out.)

I can't think of anything else, but you can ask questions in the comments. I'll answer as soon as the baby goes down for a nap. No really.

 

Writers Write (Good Excuses are Still Excuses)

I'm a writer. I have a newborn baby and a toddler and a preschooler. I don't write every day. I tell myself I'm tired, that my brain is too mushy to write, that I'm too busy, and that this is just a time in my life that's especially hard. Other people tell me to focus on myself. That I have enough on my plate. But you know what?

None of that matters.

Because I'm a writer.

If I want to consider myself a writer, I need to be writing. Regularly. Small amounts are fine. 10 minutes a time is fine. But I need to be writing.

The fact is, life is rarely easy. Sometimes I imagine myself 20 years from now, with the children grown. I'm in a quiet house and I'm always eager and excited to write. I'm always inspired. I have my own desk and a corkboard with inspiring pictures tacked all over it. I write for hours a day, blissfully.

That's a fantasy. It'll never happen. Life has a way of making sure we still have to prioritize. And being a mother of small children doesn't mean I'm exempt.

If I want to be a writer, then I must write.

When I look back and count the number of days I didn't write anything (but could have), I cringe. Those were missed opportunities. Times when I could have been focused, devoted, and loyal to my readers. But it's in the past. I'm trying to see those missed opportunities as a reason to change. Wallowing doesn't help (and wishing I had worked on my book doesn't make me a writer).

So I'm resolved to be more of a writer than I was last week. There's no excuse. Because writers write.

There's Always Something

There’s always something. Even as I write this, my two year old is hitting his sister and my four year old is trying to show me all the unusual things Mary Poppins can do. Finding time to write is both a science and an art.

A science? Well, yeah. I have to make sure the kids are on a regular sleep schedule. Otherwise they sleep at different times (or not at all) and I have no time to write. And no sanity.

And of course it’s an art. All the planning in the world can fizzle into nothingness if the toddler is stubborn enough. Or, like this week, I find out moments after going grocery shopping that we have no paper towels and I forgot to buy diaper rash cream. So it takes some creativity, if I want my book to grow.

Maybe the kids will watch a movie in the other room for an hour and a half? Unlikely. Maybe one of my sisters is just dying to take care of them for me? They have busy lives, too. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s a holiday that I forgot about and my husband will be home to watch the kids for me. It could happen.

Sometimes I only get a short amount of time to write. Actually, it’s usually only a short amount of time. You know what I’ve learned to do?

Take breaks. It seems counter-intuitive. If I only have two hours or an hour and a half, it makes sense to dive into my work and get as much done as I possibly can. But taking five-minute breaks (before I get tired!) goes a long way.

So, yeah. Some weeks the kids are really good at keeping me from my writing. I do what I can.

I try to be smart (and creative and methodical and thoughtful) and I keep making progress when I can. Every drop in the bucket counts. Eventually, I produce a story I can be proud of. Even if it takes a little longer than I’d like to admit.

Take Your Proper English with You (Blog Tour)

I wrote a guest post for C.L. Roth's blog today. In it, I talk about a very personal experience I had when I was a kid. My sister read the post and asked, "Did that really happen?" Sadly, it did.

Everyone knows they’re smart when they’re little. Mommy says it all the time. Then you go to school and you realize you don’t know everything. Still, I knew I was smart. I always understood what the teacher was saying and I was usually the first kid in the class to finish my work. School was fun, and I thought that was a good thing.

Well, it is. But not everybody sees it that way.

In fifth grade, I had a group of girlfriends—neighborhood kids that went to my school. We went to each other’s houses, played outside all the time, went shopping together (as tweens are wont to do) and maybe even had a sleepover or two.

Somehow, out of the blue, I became the odd one out. As an adult, I realize this happens and that girls change a lot around this age. They can be mean and petty, and all-too-often, they turn cruel.


Read more >>

Fast Facts and Book Review by the Nerdette (Blog Tour #6)

The Nerdette (the lovely Jacqueline) is doing a blog review today! She has a Fast Facts section with some author trivia. (I always feel weird about answering what my favorite book is because it changes so often! But I did my best.)

Anyway, pop in and say hello! I'll be answering in the comments, as always.
Notes from the Nerdette

Establishing a Writing Routine: What Works for Me

My writing routine has evolved. Mostly, it centers around my kids' nap time. It also depends on what I'm working on. First drafts can be written between breaths. Whenever I get a free moment, I can sit down (butt-in-chair or BIC) and pull a couple hundred words from my muse. (Where'd you think I pulled them from?)

That doesn't work for revision, though.

Something about rewriting a scene drains me. You may recall, I'm writing by hand because, well, it works for me. The content is better (setting, conflict, voice) but it's EXHAUSTING! When my kids (finally) go to bed, I go back to my room, pull out my notebook, and pick up where I left off the day before.

Thirty minutes later, I'm resting my head on my arm with my eyes closed, trying to recover. It's physically draining.

I'm lucky to get more than four pages written.

Now, typing those pages up on the computer takes no time. It's not nearly as demanding, mentally. I usually type up the week's handwritten pages on Saturday. It comes out to about 1800 words a week.

For those of you who haven't done the math yet, that's 300 words a day. (I take off Sundays.)

Really? That's pathetic.

It's okay. You can say it. I used to write five times that. But the thing is: I'm going to save myself a whole draft. So I like to double that number. :)

Another thing I need: silence. Some people like to work with music. I've done that, and it works really well for me if I have music or dancing in the scene. Otherwise, I find it builds the world in my mind without it being on the page. (I'm not sure if that makes sense.)

But the kids have to be asleep and I can't write in the same room as my husband if he's listening to something on the computer. Sometimes I get really lucky and he'll take the kids to the park or the pool. That's prime writing time, right there. Pure quiet.

I love it.

Freezer Cooking: Surprisingly Delicious (Yet Convenient)

Our family can't eat a whole lasagna. We can't even eat half of it. So, every time I make it, I put together two smaller lasagnas (in two 9x9 pans) instead of one larger (9x13) pan. I don't cook the noodles ahead of time, I just put a little extra liquid in the sauce. I freeze one pan and cook the other. When we want lasagna again, I pull the frozen pan out in the morning, let it thaw, then bake it at dinnertime. Simple. Easy. And I think it tastes better than the fresh one.

Then I found out I'm not the only person who does this. I mean, there are some people that go all-out. I found this website called FreezerDinner.com run by a homemaker in Utah. She does freezer cooking all the time and has some great recipes on her blog.

I gave some of them a try.

The Chicken Manicotti Recipe was something new and kid-friendly!

Chicken Marengo is a new family favorite. It's like an Italian stew on rice.

So on the nights when dinner is just "throw something in the oven", I get to write!

It's my latest thing. 

Writers Write. And Garden. And Chase Kids Around. And...

I'm a writer. It's what I do. It's what I love. Writing is my escape from life.

But sometimes, writing is hard work. I'm okay with hard work, but all work and no play makes Emily a spiteful wench.

Not pretty.

So I need other outlets. Believe it or not, I have a life outside of my writing (and kids). So I'm thinking about sharing my other interests on this blog. I garden. I think I might post some pictures from my adventures through my yard. I also run (when I'm not sick or injured), read, and of course: raise my kids.

So how 'bout it? You interested in seeing what my life is like? It could be scary. To be honest, I'm not sure if I'm brave enough. Maybe that's why I'm procrastinating...